We have a bit of a problem in the Prufrock household, or rather, with the extended family of one of the household's members :::cough:::, not me, :::cough::: . Said members of one's family have an itsy bitsy issue of being massively racist. Of course they preface or follow nearly every epithet with "I'm not racist, but...", which is one of biggest pet peeves right up there with, "I'm not racist, some of my best friends are black/Asian/Latino!"
Up to this stage, our mutual reaction is to tense up and glance nervously at one another, which I know is a copout. My life's philosophy is to fight very few battles, so I don't ever speak up despite how much their behaviour disgusts me. However, now that we have a small parrot residing with us who mimics every single thing we say, regular utterances of vile, racist terms is unacceptable. The thought of my daughter saying "Paki" (their favourite racist term - used to describe anyone of Asian descent) makes me feel ill.
My in-laws view me as a snobby, domineering, career-focused, far too liberal person, so I have no doubt at all that I will shoulder the blame when The Dude speaks with them about this issue. Whatever. I'm not very happy that our tenuous relationship will suffer further, but at the cost of my daughter's well-being it's a very necessary sacrifice.
I'm curious if others have had this problem, with your own families, or that of your partner's. If so, what did you do? What would you do? This is such a make it or break it situation for me, and if they are not willing to make an effort to watch what they say around P, they won't see P. The ease with which these words and vitriol spill out from their mouths is disturbing, but all the more worrisome is the fact that they would not view what they are saying as problematic. I don't want my daughter to grow up around people who think displaying such hatred and ignorance is ok.
I have a fair amount to say on the issue of racism in this country versus that of the US, but my battery is dying and some breastfeeding programme is about to come on so all of that will need to wait. Until then - what say you?