9/01/2005

Menses in absentia

Like my uterus in the last IUI, my period has decided to pack up and vacate the premises. Perhaps my uterus and period made a mutual decision that they have had enough of this IF malarky and decided to move to Bermuda or something. If they're loyal reproductive organs and feminine functions they'll pick somewhere that I would want to go--like deepest Cornwall or something.

I'm starting to etch Roman numerals into the wall of the bathroom for every day this purgatory goes on. I keep thinking of reasons that this is day 16 post IUI with no sign of my period (knock on wood...I think), and I'm sure I'm leaving something out. When I tested on day 14 I thought that it was still logical that my period had not shown up, but the longer it goes on, the more I wonder what is happening in there. As Nico pointed out in the comments to the last post, when she does treatment with pussaries, her period sometimes doesn't arrive until 16 days after the IUI. I'm still shocked that WHYBAML did not think to mention this to me, but I'll get over it.

What if I never ovulated at all? Am I waiting for a period that won't come without medicinal provocation? What if the pussaries fucked everything up completely and absolutely nothing is going on? You can also tell how completely entrenched in this infertility thing I am, as the absolute last possibility in my mind is pregnancy. I'm more likely to self-diagnose myself as having a massive uterine tumour before I would think that I'm pregnant.

I have decided that if it doesn't arrive by the morning of day 18 (that's Saturday for those keeping score at home), I will test again. If it is negative, I will jump out my bathroom window. If it is positive, I will jump out my bathroom window. Tell my bird I loved him. Oh, and The Dude.

Random final note: For the person that searched for this, you are a sick bastard. I'm picturing a gleeful Fertile, surrounded by her hoard of beautiful laughing children, typing that search into Google. "Ha ha!" she shouts, pointing and chuckling at us miserable cows. Talk about kicking me when I'm down...I'll have you know, I'm only number 8 on the list. Try telling The Dude that after another negative test/when my period makes its debut.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Pru, My RE said to test at 14 dpiui and if AF doesn't show, then to stop the progesterone. You might want to call your Dr. and see if you should do the same.

mm said...

If and when my period returns, I'll ask that ungrateful hobag if she's seen yours. So sorry you're having to wonder what the Hell is going on down there. Hope e/t is resolved on the double.

Molly said...

Seriously, what the hell?

Note to Pru's uterus:

Umm . . . got some lining you're going shed at any point there? Or perhaps an embryo about whose presence you'd like to inform her? One or the other, please. Preferably the latter.

Manuela said...

Oh, hon'... I can so relate to this horror known as reproductive limbo... I'm so sorry...

Jenn said...

Ugh, I'm only two behind you in that search.

Progesterone suppositories usually delayed my period by at least 4 days.

Nico said...

My last cycle I got my period 19dpi. I didn't want to stop the pussaries, even though I'd gotten negative hpts (days 12, 17 and 18), just in case I might actually be pg. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Sick and twisted uteri!!!

Em said...

It must be something about fertility treatments and too much information. Everything was so easy when I was ignorant - my period always showed up.

Ova Girl said...

Limbo land... try to hang in there. There's gotta be something happening in there... hope you knoe for sure soon.



And the bird says: don't do it!

Anonymous said...

Progesterone or not, my period comes early, because it's a bitch like that.

And about that search, I mean, WTF? What a sick, sick person.

Emily

thalia said...

Pru, Sorry your period is being a bitch. Love those search terms. There are some fabulous wierdos out there.

Hanging on to hope is a real killer, isn't it!