12/03/2008

Where does the time go?

In the past I have obliquely referred to the earlier days of IF blogs, reflecting on those heady, halcyon days of bloggers now long gone. I have thought of them again recently, in the midst of Mel's IComLeavWe madness. I failed at it, again, though this will come as a surprise to no one.

I was good for an entire day, leaving the obligatory six comments on blogs new to me. I just can't help lamenting (and apologies to any IComLeavWe participants) how things were in the good old days. There were so many of us! We talked of wandings, cervical mucus, procreative sex under duress, marital strife brought on by the stress of infertility. It was all there, usually with naughty language and the hint of delightful cynicism that I treasure so much.

I'm not singling anyone out, but I confess, I find a lot of newer infertility blogs lack that raw honesty. Phew. I've been wanting to say that for awhile but have been too fearful to do so. Now it's out, and I feel much better now. I feel I can carry on living my life as normal again.

Anyway, rather than focusing on my negativity, who's up for a trip down memory lane? Remember MM from LimboParty? Sweet jesus on a stick I loved that woman. In fact, I think I declared my everlasting adoration upon my first reading of her blog. I had a lovely long email from MM last year (year before?) and failed to email her back because of my severe communication issues. Stupid, stupid me.

Another one that I have recalled is Sarah from Badlands. Another wonderful blog that in my recollection of it I feel the need to sigh wistfully. I know Sarah stopped blogging, but I haven't heard anything about her in years. I came across some funny comments she left on centuries old posts which made me smile, and as always in cases like this, I wonder what happened to her.

One of my all time favourites is Deborah, formerly of The Trying Game. Oh Deborah, Deborah, Deborah, how I love thee, even after all this time. Deborah was, sorry, IS (she's not dead!!) painfully witty and just all-round delicious. Once every year or so she crawls out of her dark little hole somewhere in the far reaches of the internet and leaves a comment here. I got quite giddy when I read the last one, because at the very heart of it all I'm just a creepy stalker who wallows in what used to be. I even got a picture of her gorgeous girl riding a pony, along with accompanying text jokingly calling her daughter a "pussy" for being frightened. Like I said, I fucking love this woman.

There are others, but I've just realised it's nearly bedtime and thanks to The Dude locking us out tonight and necessitating a mile-long walk with a toddler in the freezing cold, I'm tired. What no-longer-blogging bloggers do you miss? Also, any word on how the above ex-bloggers are doing? Hi, I'm a crazy stalker, as indicated above.

27 comments:

Jen said...

I miss those guys, too.

I also miss Persephone from Barren Season, and Suz from Within the Woods.

Molly said...

Awww, totally. I've still got LimboParty on my Bloglines just in case. I loved the smartass days of yore.

Nic said...

There are quite a few I miss... but of course I don't even remember their names/sites what with the mush my brain has turned into. I think people should have to post just once a year with an update instead of just leaving us hanging. Privacy, shmivacy! :)

Melody said...

Ditto Suz from Within the Woods and I miss Getupgrrl from Chez Miscarriage. I understand why they drift away though, I've got 4 year old twins from IVF and my life now is so far from where I used to be when I was knee-deep in IF.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Getupgrrl, without a doubt!

Miz S said...

Getupgrrl! I loved her blog! What a story.

Anyone remember Cancer, Baby? She was incredible. May she rest in peace.

Helen said...

Add me to the Chez Miscarriage camp. Loved her.

And I miss Ornery Lotus Blossom, too.

I also miss the IF bloggers who went about it real. Real got you in trouble writing about it, but real made you feel a little less alone.

hydrangeasarepretty said...

Persephone, for sure! She started a "life with kids" blog, but hasn't posted in AGES. I think her sister was undergoing chemo for breast cancer, so she dropped off.

Also, Karen - one of the originals. "Infertile Myrtle." OH how I miss her.

And Wasa-something - OY. I'm getting old.

But yeah, I miss those ladies, for sure.

oro said...

hey, Karen's still blogging at land of milk and poo! Grrl, Emily, Juliana...so many.

DD said...

Maybe I should quit blogging so you will love me again. *sigh*

Mary Scarlet
MM
Ornery
Suz
Portlairge
Sisyphus

fisher queen said...

I really miss Manuela. I know she is pwp- does anyone know what she is up to?

B.Mare said...

I miss blogging from Heidi of Lost and Finding but we're still in touch and I get to see pics of her delicious kid so it's all good.

Sometimes I get a major craving for a slice of Getupgrrl-especially from the days before she got popular and it was PRIME SNARK.

Emily of Scrambled Eggs! Panic Womb! Beaver Girl! Wessel! Deborah of Trying Game! And'll always think of Cancer, Baby.

DrSpouse said...

I started blogging and reading blogs just as Chez Miscarriage closed down and I really wish I could have read her...

Betty M said...

I think of Cancer, Baby often too. Her blog was up for quite some time after she died and I went back again and again. She was very special.

WonderMama said...

Beaver Girl, Deb from Trying Game, GetupGrrl, Karen, Suz, Avonlea....
And Cancer, Baby, of course.

There are so many I miss. The IF blogging is different now. I feel kind of dirty for using words like "snatch" and phrases like "ride on the wand" because everyone else is talking about embies and baby dust. I miss the foul language, cynicism and snark!

nutsinmay said...

I thought it was just me. I blundered about the blogosphere for a while thinking 'what is wrong with these people? How can a person go through infertility without swearing and bitter humour? How?' and then I decided there was soemthing wrong with me (but hey, we knew that) because the word 'embie' made me puke. I prefer leech. As in 'Go, little leeches! Dig in! Suck all the calcium out of your mother's teeth!'. Earnt me no friends.

Sooo it took me a while to find bloggy persons I felt comfortable with, and I completely missed the First Wave of Great Infertility Bloggers. Have fallen between two stools. Help I can't get up.

deborah said...

Oh Pru, Pru, Pru...you flatter me. See how a well-placed "fuck" can unite the internet?

My former (and in a few cases, current) must-read list includes Beaver Girl, Mare, Vintage Ute, Soper, Scrambled Eggs, Chez Miz and Hardscrabble. And of course, you. Us former central PA ho's gotta stick together.

It's just a fuckity fucking shame that we can longer read about the gory details of some stranger's cervical mucus. God, those were the days.

Lollipop Goldstein said...

I was going to say Cancer Baby and then saw that everyone else already said it as I scrolled down to leave my comment.

Lut C. said...

I miss
Chez Miscarriage,
Laughter and Forgetting,
Scrambled Eggs
Searching for Zanity
and others ...

Jenn said...

I think everyone has named mine. Suz, Grrl, Deborah, Panic Womb, Emily from Scrambled Eggs. I know Soper is still blogging, but I miss Infertile Coffee Talk. I know I'm missing people.

Fisher Queen-Manuela recently took her whole blog down.

Helen said...

As previous requested, I'm here to throw my toys out of the pram over no music Monday.

If you're taking requests, I'd love to see Pru Does the Holidays Music Monday Style.

If you're not taking requests I'll cheerfully STFU.

Clover said...

Yes, yes, yes. Tis not the same anymore. Although, I'm one to talk with my current rate of posting once every six months.
And I'd email MM back. I'm sure she'd love to hear from you, no matter how much time has gone by.

Panda said...

Well, what a post to come back into reading blogs on...

Hiya Pru. I noticed noone misses my ramblings so just as well I stopped when I did.

Has something happened in the IF blog world? Did someone make a law against discussion of wandings? Babydust? Are you fucking kidding me?

Had the baby. A girl. Ella. Now have PND. Woot.

hairyfarmerfamily said...

Got so sad reading this post and all the responses that I haven't commented until now. Because I have no idea who any of these people are. I know I missed out on soooooo much. That I had a virtual home all this time... but I never found it until this year. It's not just that I could have really used the help and support when times were hard, but also that a well-written post lifts my entire day, and it sounds as if there's so many I'll never get to read. Such a shame when people take down their blogs... and I do hope I haven't missed the peak of the bloggy wave.

Anne said...

Nothing, nothing will ever compare to the freak genius of getup grrl. I *mourn* her. I used to have her email address and lost it, but emailing wasn't the same anyway. She wrote the most amazingly honest, searingly witty, polished posts and I so wish she would just get a damn publishing contract already. Seriously, the Tina Feys of the world have *nothing* on her. Our grrl was Monty Python in the stirrups.

Thalia said...

Getupgrrl was the first infertility blog I found, so will always be part of my blessed memories. I third or tenth all the other names mentioned but btw Karen is still blogging at Cheek about both her girls, so you don't need to lament her oh commenters. And Reprogirl, no one mentioned her. Her blog was called 'the means of reproduction' - what's not to love?

sarah said...

I still use "floor cake" and "NBHHY" to get through my IVF cycles. As a relitivly new blogger (Last Jan), I know that some of the attacks that the more out there and wacky bloggers took in the old days, are just not something I'm up to. But, I do write some really funny stuff, and I never write about 'baby dancing' excpet in an ironic way. I also foudn going through this that there are times when my bitterness was too painful for me,and I had to find other ways to cope.
But I wish Getupp Grrl would publish her old blog in a book. Even anonymously. I need some of those entires to make sense of the decisions I need to make. What about me? what about my needs? Wah wah wah.